Keeping Your Relationship Strong With Your Children After A Divorce

Keeping Your Relationship Strong With Your Children After A Divorce

Let’s face it; divorce is a pretty big deal to a kid. Not only does it mean their parents’ relationship is at an end, it also means that they will have less time with each. Here are a few tips to help quell their fears and pursue what’s best for their future.

Don’t Put The Child In The Middle

Kids don’t want to take sides, they don’t want to worry about the other parent when they are with you. Don’t talk to them about your ex in a way that will cause them to take sides. Taking the high road is a good communication strategy to take your child out of the middle.

Most parents are wise to this, but a child may learn to play one parent off the other to manipulate the situation to their advantage. Kids do this whether their parents are together or not, but how you deal with it in divorce could either help them or hurt them. Good communication with your ex-spouse provides a strong parenting front based on agreement. Even when you disagree, resist letting your kids know.

For example, let’s say your child tries to tell you that “Mom changed bedtime rules on school nights”. Use the wise old strategy of “trust but verify”. An example of taking the high road and keeping a strong parenting front would be to say something like, “Wow, that is a big change. Let me call your mom real quick to see if there’s more I need to know about this.” Good communication gives parents the opportunity to take kids out of the middle of any conflict and let them just be kids.


Many kids misbehave as a reaction to the stress, anxiety and sadness they feel over the separation of their parents. However, the best thing you can do for your child is to be consistent. Yes, be empathetic to your kids due to the fact that they are going through a rough time, but stand your ground when they cross the line. Some of the following are reasons a child may act out:

  • The unwanted change
  • They feel like life is out of their control
  • They are testing boundaries
  • They feel the divorce is their fault
  • They are angry
  • They are sad
  • They are scared

You Won’t Be Perfect

Understand that it is normal to experience many different emotions and possibly be a nervous wreck right after the divorce. Divorce is the end of a relationship, and as with any death, there is a grieving process you will go through when you separate from your spouse. No parent is perfect, but putting your kids first is always the best strategy.

If you are going through a divorce and fear losing your children or having your parenting time whittled down to zero contact Indiana Father’s Rights Attorney Stanley E. Robison, Jr. Call today at 812-945-3055.

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